He is for us.

reindeer

As we are approaching Christmas and hearing the story of Christ’s birth more and more, I think of my own child. Adeline. My own perfect angel who God sent to answer my prayer. Now that she is here, other wants and desires have filled my heart. Why is it that when God answers one prayer, suddenly I’m onto asking for the next. It makes me feel guilty. So I can’t help but take time this Christmas to reflect on this answered prayer and give him praise, rather than ask for something more. God has already given me the greatest gift of all by allowing me to become a mother to the most beautiful, happy baby I have ever seen.

I wanted a baby so badly. So, so badly. For several months, I prayed and longed for a pregnancy. I never lost faith my time would come, but I did lose patience. Is that possible to be faithful, yet impatient? It was for me, but maybe that just means I wasn’t faithful enough. I was selfish and wanted to be pregnant the instant Greg and I decided it was time. But instead, God had us wait. What felt like an extremely long eight months of trying, quickly felt like it wasn’t so bad after all when I saw those two pink lines. The waiting was worth every minute of those eight months. As amazing as it was to bring Adeline into this world on April 26th, 2016, I am not afraid to admit that the morning I found out I was pregnant, August 15th, 2015, was probably just as amazing.

(Side note: I know so many people wait far longer for a pregnancy than a measly eight months, and my heart and prayers go out to them.)

God taught me patience. He brought Greg and me closer together. He showed me how to be joyful (or at least how to try really hard to be joyful) for others, including close friends of mine, who became pregnant in the midst of my longing for my own pregnancy.

Most importantly, I learned that God is for us. He is not against us. 

God wanted me to become a mother, as I knew all along. He was by my side the entire way, allowing me to cry; accepting me despite my frustration, impatience, and selfishness; and giving me hope to be faithful through it all. God was never punishing me or making me wait out of spite. He was (and is) always for me. He supports me like any father would do for his daughter, times infinity.

When I take a moment to remind myself of this, I instantly feel God’s grace upon me. We have the King of Kings on our side! How could it get any better than that? He is the most patient, forgiving, and loving father we could ever dream. We make mistakes and lose faith, yet he continues to answer our prayers.

One of my favorite Bible verses is Psalm 37:4. “Take delight in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” If we turn to God every day, asking for his will to be done and for his desires to be placed in our hearts, he will give us those desires and guide our lives down the right path. Sure, there will be struggles along the way, but we can be sure he is right there to fight for us. It may be a quick answer or it may require us to be more patient than we knew we could be. Ultimately, he will bring us out on top.

 

Advertisements